Monday, August 31, 2009

a girl can dream...

Things I fantasize about on a semi-regular basis:

  • being able to enjoy a red velvet cupcake without murderously ruining my digestive tract and feeling like I want to die.
  • scoring a full-time professorship at a major university somewhere were summer lasts more than twelve weeks, where there is lots of sunshine, where I can grow herbs and vegetables in a backyard, and where I can still live in an urban, interesting, diverse city center.
  • being interviewed by WNYY's Terri Gross on Fresh Air. (Seriously, if you don't know this show, you HAVE to tune in to your NPR affiliate and hear it; it's the greatest.) She asks me questions about a successful career as an essayist and short story writer, about my family and my upbringing. I am hilariously witty, my answers are thoughtful and compelling, and my pauses are loaded, and don't at all sound unprepared.
  • being graceful and strong enough to invert my body and do a handstand, forearm balance, and maybe even a headstand, with no fear and no pain to my body.
  • hearing my mother say to me, "I understand. I think you're right. I think your idea is wonderful, and I think you are wonderful."
  • hearing my mother say to me, "I'm sorry."
  • having health insurance I can afford.
  • watching my partner do a job that is an investment in his artist's soul and his skill as a writer, and not just that keep us in blue jeans and food.
  • the choice to do the thing that is good for my body and good for the planet not being the choice that is too expensive for me to make.
  • being able to afford the therapy I need.
  • his mother giving me a hug, and saying "I've been thinking about you."
  • being able to swim with grace and ease and strength, and always believing I will have the wisdom and stamina to put my head above water and breathe air, and never worry that I will try to breathe water instead.
  • choosing not to explain myself or my actions if I don't want to.
  • being motivated to make the planet a better place one small choice at a time, and doing so by myself, so I don't get caught up in what others are thinking of me, or how my work compares to their work.
  • gorgeous high heels I can wear for more than an hour without wanting to hurl them into Lake Michigan.
  • trusting the storyteller inside me and never having to fear that the fountain's drying up.

3 comments:

PrincessMax said...

I like all of these. Especially the one about your mom. I'm putting money on the Fresh Air one, though.

Jessica Young said...

Thanks. :)

Laura said...

I love this....